After a divorce, is it possible to stay friends with your now ex-in-laws?

After a bitter divorce, is it possible to stay on friendly terms with your now ex-in-laws?

Likely? No. But that doesn’t mean you should abandon hope.

Indeed, some divorces end with the in-laws siding with you, not your spouse. This doesn’t happen very often, but maybe it will occur in your situation.

Frankly, you and your in-laws are not expected to remain on the same terms as when you were married to their son or daughter.

Mature people understand that with the end of a marriage comes the end of the in-law relationship as well. They know and accept that we all experience some bitter disappointments of one kind or another along the road of life. They don’t let these misfortunes fester.

There are at least two imperatives for why you should do your best to live the Golden Rule with your ex in-laws (assuming that your ex in-laws are not physical or emotional dangers to themselves or others):

  • it’s your moral obligation; and
  • holding grudges, denying forgiveness, and indulging in hypocritical self-righteousness only hurts yourself. Besides, if you aren’t gracious there can be no hope of maintaining a friendly relationship with your ex in-laws, if you want such a relationship.
    • and if you have children (who are, like it or not, your ex in-laws grandchildren and always will be), treating them shabbily only teaches your children to treat others the same way.

Utah Family Law, LC | | 801-466-9277

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