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You Reap What You Sow.

I’m Braxton Mounteer, a legal assistant. I’ve written and talked about this problem before, but it’s a recurring problem and a serious one. It’s hard enough to muster the courage to hire a divorce lawyer and pay so much money to your lawyer to represent you in your divorce in the hope that your lawyer can protect you, guide you through the divorce process, help you make sense of what’s going on, and bring you to the end of the divorce process with an equitable outcome. So why do so many clients make it so difficult for their lawyers to help them? Why do so many clients procrastinate? Why do they ignore or put off until the last minute their attorneys’ requests for vital documents. Why do they evade or give incomplete or outright false answers to important questions? Why do so many clients act as though their wish is the lawyer’s command? Look, we know this is a hard process for you. We know it’s hard to manage all of life’s challenges without a divorce being added to the mix. We know you don’t like having to go through your financial records and share them with strangers. We know you don’t want to go over your criminal history, your infidelity, your substance abuse, and other examples of your bad judgment you’ve been trying to leave in the past and move on from and even forget. We know you don’t like what feels like intrusions into your privacy, your mental and physical health history, relationships between you and your spouse, between you and your children, between you and other members of your extended family and circle of friends. We know that you hate already being in dire financial straits before you had to start budgeting to pay for a divorce lawyer. We know you don’t like feeling ignorant of the legal system and all the terms getting thrown around as the lawyers and the courts discuss your fate. We know how tempting it is to believe if you simply bury your head in the sand all of this will go away. But it won’t. It’s tempting to fool yourself into believing that once you hire a divorce lawyer it’s all in your lawyer’s hands. But it’s not. If you have a house, some retirement savings, minor children, if you are facing the prospect of paying or receiving alimony, if there’s substantial marital debt, then you will almost surely benefit in the long run from investing in the services of a skilled divorce lawyer. The most effective lawyers work with a client, not merely for a client. Lawyers are called counselors for a reason; They confer with you, they advise you, but the choices are yours to make. Wouldn’t you rather have as many options and choices open to you? Wouldn’t you rather act instead of being acted upon? In a very real sense, how much your lawyer can help you depends upon how much you help your lawyer. You reap what you sow.

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