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Do prenuptial agreements make a wedding/marriage healthier?

Do prenuptial agreements make a wedding/marriage healthier?

Make? In all cases? No.

Can prenuptial agreements make a wedding and marriage healthier? It is conceivable that some people might find planning for divorce before they have married a comfort to them so that they don’t worry so much about divorce while married because they believe they have already “addressed” that possibility in advance. And if a marriage fails that should fail, then having a prenuptial agreement in place in advance can (can but does not guarantee) help make the divorce process easier, faster, less costly, and less acrimonious.

Do prenuptial agreements generally make a wedding and marriage healthier? In my experience, no. With extremely rare exception, every marriage is going to have its rough patches, and I have found that prenuptial agreements make divorce deceptively easy to contemplate and desire when the going gets rough in marriage, even though divorce is neither necessary nor in either spouse’s (or their children’s) interest.

I have found that prenuptial agreements send the wrong message, and that message is: I don’t see marriage as a lifelong endeavor. I have so little commitment to marriage and so little faith in you and me and our impending marriage that I don’t think we’ll last, and because I feel this way, I want an exit strategy in place now. Who’d want to marry someone like that? Success is meaningless without the risk of failure. You can’t have the benefits of marriage without going all in, without risking having your heart broken. Spouses who are mutually devoted to each other will tell that a loving, supportive marriage is more than worth the effort, the pains, the disappointments, the sacrifices.

Marriage isn’t the problem. It’s marrying without being careful in one’s choice of spouse, without treating marriage as a sacred thing, and without being committed to your spouse’s and your marriage’s success.

Utah Family Law, LC | divorceutah.com | 801-466-9277

https://www.quora.com/Does-prenuptial-agreements-make-a-wedding-healthier/answer/Eric-Johnson-311?prompt_topic_bio=1

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Why Not Have the Judge Interview the Children About Child Custody?

Why Not Have the Judge Interview the Children About Child Custody?

Why Appoint a GAL or Custody Evaluator When the Judge Can Interview the Children?

This post is the first in series of 15 posts on the subject of custody evaluations and the appointment of guardians ad litem (“GALs” for short) in Utah child custody cases when the judge could simply interview the children instead. You do not have to read all 16 posts to benefit from this series. Read as many or as few as you wish.

The purpose of this series is to make the case for the proposition that an interview by the judge is a faster, more accurate, more particular, more reliable, and less expensive form of evidence than what a GAL and/or custody evaluator provides.

I can imagine a case in which ordering a custody evaluation and/or appointment of a guardian ad litem may be warranted, even necessary, but generally guardians ad litem and custody evaluations are an obscene waste of time and money and effort. They don’t just fail to justify their costs; they spectacularly fail to justify their costs. Instead, in the overwhelming majority of child custody disputes, the court can and should interview the children directly. The Utah Code expressly provides for this. Section 30-3-10(5), to be exact. Yet in 24 years of practice I have never had a judge agree to interview a child in a child custody dispute. Not once. And I submit that’s ridiculous. In the posts that follow we will discuss why judges interviewing children is clearly superior to appointing guardians ad litem and/or custody evaluations for the vast majority of child custody dispute cases.

Utah Family Law, LC | divorceutah.com | 801-466-9277

 

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