Tag: relationships

Why do people get married only to divorce a few years later?

Why do people get married only to divorce a few years later? Doesn’t really sound like love to me. 

With the exception of those divorces that take place shortly after a marriage due to abuse, mental illness, fraud, and those kinds of things OR a divorce for which there are common law or statutory grounds (adultery, impotency of the respondent at the time of marriage, willful desertion, willful neglect, habitual drunkenness of the respondent, conviction of the respondent for a felony, irreconcilable differences of the marriage, incurable insanity), a divorce after a just a few years of marriage between two otherwise normal people is usually due (in no particular order) to: 

  • realizing the marriage was a mistake, that it’s a genuinely good idea and mutually beneficial to both spouses to end the marriage and a bad idea to spend any more time or effort trying to salvage it; or 
  • selfishness and/or fear or shame; something that renders one to feel unworthy or unwilling to commit to the success of the marriage and family 

Utah Family Law, LC | | 801-466-9277  

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Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 46

Law from a legal assistant’s point of view, week 46: Simplify, but do so Elegantly 

By Quinton Lister, legal assistant  

As a legal assistant to a divorce attorney, I find that one of the most difficult things to do in the law is to take a legal concept and simplify it without dumbing it down. A good lawyer has the ability to simplify, but can do so in an elegant way.  

The best way to help a client, is to help them understand enough about their case so that they feel empowered. That doesn’t mean that the client will understand everything about their case (any divorce case can get complicated quickly), but if a client can feel empowered and that they can do something then that will make the attorney’s work more effective. Legalese is a real phenomenon and any uninitiated individual would feel overwhelmed by too much lawyer speak. However, if you simplify legal concepts too much, then that same uninitiated individual can be misled because they do not understand enough about their situation.  

Utah Family Law, LC | | 801-466-9277 

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Where or who do lawyers look to when they need a lawyer?

I ask my lawyer friends (few though they are because with few exceptions I find lawyers to be generally perfidious people, and I don’t like perfidious people), or, if my lawyer friends don’t have the answer, then I turn to my lawyer enemies whom I nevertheless trust to be honest with me.

If you can find a good (“good” meaning both highly “morally upright” and “competent”) lawyer as a friend and be a good friend to that lawyer, you’ll be truly blessed. A lawyer who is both good and skilled is one of the most beneficial friendships you can have.

Utah Family Law, LC | | 801-466-9277

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We Can Work It Out

Could a prolonged lack of exercise exacerbate anxieties and stress, even cause them to accumulate? Could this ultimately result in increased marital conflict? Is your husband angry and/or aggressive? Exercise may help.

Many relationships end due in part to unmanaged anxieties and stress, which these people could perhaps manage (even easily manage) through exercise, particularly for men. I know that throughout my personal relationships I would often become easily irritated by little things that my spouse did (or didn’t do). After several such incidents my wife suggested I go run, ride my bike, skip rope, or hit the gym. I didn’t want to. But the immediate results were always beneficial; I would come home relaxed and more contented. The anger and aggression had been literally worked out of me.

Is your husband (or wife) irritable and/or aggressive? Suggest that a workout and then see how your spouse feels and acts. It’s a simple step, but worth taking. Try it.

Utah Family Law, LC | | 801-466-9277

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